If you were to classify “spanking”, would you place it under form of discipline or would you tag it as child abuse? It’s amazing how there can be a very thin line between loving your toddler and believing that a “little spank” should set him right; and actual child abuse. This is a very sensitive topic and the worldwide parent population is still divided when it comes to spanking or not.
Scientific finding and surveys both agree that spanking children do produce shy or testy children (you would notice that these are on both ends of the behavioral spectrum). Yet the same surveys and scientific studies have proven that most parents today have been spanked when they were kids. Thus, they believe that they grew up to be okay and this same form of discipline should be alright. To put this matter to rest though, a parent must always believe that a relationship is set on mutual respect and values, therefore, spanking should not be resorted to as a form of discipline.
When parents see their terrible two wrecking havoc, it’s certain that they deem toddler discipline as a gargantuan task. This is why it’s sometimes easier for them to just opt to spanking. Indeed, disciplining 1-2 year old kids can be a difficult job and as a parent, it is your duty to draw the line and to set up absolute rules that these young minds would be able to comprehend. If you’re tired of hearing squeals and seeing tantrums, it’s time to read some how-to’s on toddler discipline.
Their Just Testing the Boundaries
Don’t fret if you find out that your toddler likes to test your patience. This is a normal part of child development and as a parent, you should be glad that your child is on this behavioral stage. Remember the cardinal rule? They have to learn that there are boundaries set for them (a.k.a. rules) and once they cross these “lines”, a consequence is set to follow.
Boundary testing is a trial and error process. Do not expect much on the first few days as there would be much howling and misbehaviors. The antidote to these wailings is consistency—just learn to stand your ground and tell your toddler that NO, indeed, means NO.
What Works for Basketball Players and Toddlers
Time out. This is a very simple method of calming the nerves of an irritable child. You can implement this by setting one room in your house as the “time out corner”. Once the 2-3 minute time out is over, explain in the simplest language, what went wrong and why they had to be kept inside the room. Make sure to implement this mode of discipline just as soon as the toddler has committed the behavioral infraction. This is also one good way of ignoring any tantrum that has ensued, as the child would learn that he will not be able to talk to mommy or daddy unless he stops squealing.
Diverting the Energy Someplace Else
When a toddler is bent on getting what he wants, he will resort to crying and tugging and even to a full-blown tantrum. These are moments when the toddler’s energy is at its peak and his parent must learn to redirect the child’s energy to a more positive activity. You can ask your child to help you in watering the plants or doing the dishes instead. Toddlers want to feel important (don’t we all?) and that’s why this is a good alternative for them.
A Soft Answer Turns Away Wrath
Whoever authored this saying on the Bible was definitely a wise man. It’s better to encourage a child to do something rather than spank him so he would give in. Learn to use the words “please” and “may you” around them so they would also grow up using these phrases. Never spank or shout at him in front of other people—don’t say you were not forewarned (coz they will grow up hating that moment!).
Always remember that toddler discipline might be difficult but it’s not impossible. In order to gain your child’s respect, you must know and understand his behaviors and way of thinking. Remember that you are an adult and you have a sense of right and wrong while your child has yet to learn the ropes. Strengthen your relationship with your child by setting the example and being firm about your rules. And above all, love him with all your might and you should be able to reap the reward that only sole loving can give!
Filed under: Parenting Tagged: | child discipline, discipline, disciplining a child, Parenting, spanking
